Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
you made me suck your tit in the car and kept saying "good boy. I love you so much. good boy."
I spent the entire night stroking his hair. He was cool with it. Never thought a ginger stoner would help me work through my social anxiety but here we are.
he was wearing a widestriped red gingham suit jacket with complete sincerity im not surprised she beat the shit out of him
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
He was about to go in...and he fell off the bed. Ruined mood!
Randomize
