I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
I'm going to get so drunk tonight, I actually feel bad about the 30 seconds of drunken awkward sex I'm going to have with one lucky fat chick.
I worked with a girl tonight that recognized me solely from a keg stand she witnessed me do sophmore year. Needless to say this made my night
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
You told me to ditch them in the park, and when she jumped onto the car to stop us, you told me to scrape her off against a parked Jeep. That drunk.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Building a door into the garage so when I bring girls home my mom doesn't wake up.
Pathetic yet considerate
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize
