Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
Just barfed in my hand. Needless to say, this day is off to a great start
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
We should probably just have a threeway and get everyone on the same page.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I have to lie to someone and move five gallons of fermenting alcohol across campus but after that i'll hit you up 4 sho
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
