:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
And I feel like pitchers of margaritas accidentally make it down your throat a lot.
I mean, the lady at the Mexican restaurant insisted. She said she would win a prize if she sold another pitcher before noon. And plus I got to wear a sombrero
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I asked him if we could hang out sometime when we weren't hammered. He said he'd email me his number... that's when I knew I was going to die alone
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
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