Midget sex pt 2 tonight
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
So mom called me from the hospital laughing her ass off. Apparently my sister is allergic to cocaine...
But I mean how many guys can say they get blow jobs and grilled cheese with football
My boss brought her husband's telescope to work, so all of us that work in the MMJ Dispensary got high and had an impromptu Blood Moon viewing party. I love my job.
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
Randomize
