We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
Anything that's based on a blow job I'm in favor of.
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
I feel as if I owe my bloodstream some tequila.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Just cleaned someone else's sperm off of my bedroom wall. Never throwing a house party again.
He is dating a girl who is on the Olympic shooting team...I've never been so scared to hit on a guy with a girlfriend in my entire life.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
You know that pill i snorted last night? Yeh, its just hitting me now..... At work
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
