This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
We just shotgunned beers for America
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I have learned that if you don't want to hook up with the guy who walked you home, food is great compensation.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
that was THE gayest party i've ever been to
To be fair, the theme was Cabaret. I don't know what you were expecting.
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
Twas still the Saturday before Christmas \nAnd it’s still fucking snowing\nAnd Steve wished he slowed down \nOn all the fucking drinking
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