My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
She told me she's into girls now. I told her there would be a full bottle of jäger and an empty bed here Friday.
True love is when you jack off and continue talking to the girl you like
Why do you text me weird shit like this?
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
I told the American that we should start banging in Canada incase I get hurt and have to go to the hospital.. is that rude to say?
I woke up to some strange woman rubbing peanut butter on my thighs
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
I party with great urgency now.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
