are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Dude you should see the looks were getting for ordering a pitcher of beer with breakfast.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
I woke up with her dog licking the wedding cake out of my ear and her sister finishing our Jaeger
I haven't had to masterbate since I started dating him over a year ago. I don't even know if I remember how and my vagina is calling.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
Randomize
