A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Ahhh the shame of taking out my recycling
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
Randomize
