Today at work while talking to my co-worker we both realized at the same time that last year I had a one night stand with his roommate and he was in the living room drinking coffee when I did the walk of shame. YAY.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
I have a very hazy flashback of me making out with a guy in a seashell bra??! Can you confirm or deny
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
I'm usually good at keeping a straight face, but not while singing a ballad to a stranger in a bathroom.
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
Why do pants feel so unnatural once you enter your own house
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