omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
once we finished he held up the condom and asked if i wanted to keep it as a souvenir.
oh and he was serious.
i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
