suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
I need the number of a restaurant that delivers, has lock-picking abilities, and is okay with full frontal male nudity. Entirely too hungover to get out of bed.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
I'm really good at handling things like foreskin and speech impediments.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
i think I'm just gonna buy a new vibrator, body pillow, some guys cologne to spray on it, a life time supply of wine and weed and be done with all this shit
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
Randomize