You going to midnight mass? we need a dd
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
So he told me he didn't have a condom, paused, and then said "so, pulling out" and tried to high five me.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
We swapped clothes. He left in a v-neck and I left in a tuxedo. Classiest walk of shame or the gayest?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
What are you bringing to class tomorrow?
sorrow
Randomize