Little spoons don't ask big questions
he cried for an hour, then he threw up on my lap then started singing party in the usa...opera style...
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
home. only unpacked the necessities...contact case and beer.
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
