scale of 1-10 how well do I give head
5, but i have never had a 10. best was an 8 so if i grade you on a curve you are a 7. ish.
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
Blacked out at the beach and unblacked out at a piano bar singing Tiny Dancer.
She looks like a junkie muppet...awful
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I bet Billy Ray Cyrus wishes he had pulled out now....
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
I got my period today and I cried tears of joy. And then just cried because my cramps are actually killing me from the inside out.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
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