And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
You made eat vitamins until I threw up
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Just made a drunk dude do 20 push-ups. In the parking lot of the bar tonight for a keystone light I found in the back of my truck.
Oh yum
Actually, I take that back. You can only have it if I'm allowed to French braid the mullet.
I need vitamin water and Jesus :/
Its guy fieris flavor town of suffering™
YAS. BRING CRAB.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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