remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
just fed a duck at the lake a weed brownie. it hasnt moved in 20 minutes.
just got invited to smoke a bowl by a guy who has a prostetic leg and has been on the jerry springer show multiple times. I love my life right now
Itd be like fucking a waterbed thats been locked in a barn for two years.
Where in the FUCK do you get your analogies
I took my exam the next day still drunk and failed, but I kno for a fact that I filled in the bubbles for my name perfectly
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
She curled up in the corner, screamed "THE BLANKET IS SO WARM" and promptly passed out with her face in the dogbed. No one bothered to reposition her.
No my first time having an orgasm with you will not be on face time
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
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