return my video game
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
Is this because I accidentally peed on you?
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
