we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I only had sex with him so I could try to steal his roommate's cat, what kind of girl do you think I am?
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Too high to wash a dish but just high enough for a kitchen fire
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