We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
It says i should accept HIV aids as my friend on facebook.We have 12 friends in common. I need new friends.
It just sucks seeing everyone get flowers but me...
yeah, but they die. it takes a while, but they die. just like all of these kids relationships will. tequila doesnt die. its a live in the moment thing... like a valentines day one night stand. so long run, tequila is the better gift.
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
I don't know what possessed you to do that, but you have to give the stripper more money before you try to check her oil or they are going to throw us out every time you do that.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
That amount of times your family has seen my boobs is getting ridiculous.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
Randomize