I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
I had her number in my wallet, I was sitting on a winning ticket for the blowjob lottery and didn't know
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Randomize
