its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
She said she couldnt do it today but shed make it up to me next week
stick it in her butt and if she asks, say that thats what you thought she meant
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
You kept yelling in my face " YOU'RE GONNA HAVE TO SUCK A DICK TONIGHT!"
Lol no. She's home safe. You forget she is too pretty to get arrested.
Pretty sure I love my nipple piercing more than I'll love my children someday
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I remember walking into a bathroom stall that had a couple fucking in it and giving them a condom and a thumbs up and then leaving
Just saw the pics from the bachelor party. When the hell did we go to southie. And why was there a chicken in the limo..? You guys really are my best friends.
You hit your head and proceeded to fall in the floor, curl up in my lap and make me rock you like a small infant. I was beginning to worry until you started to sing "Rock me momma like a wagon wheel".
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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