oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I saw you try to drink out of a soda machine at taco bell, don't worry about judging
I can promise you that this new years eve will rival the one from senior year when we got that exchange student deported.
There are two things I love in this world. Dick and cats. Why can't I just have dick and cats forever
You're worse than that girl who made out with her cousin at that party
That was you...
I just think his face would be more attractiveif it was framed by my thighs
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
all I'm saying is if you're gonna fuck a fat chick do it in a pool it's like zero gravity or something
how did you graduate high school
Pinterest knows I’m getting divorced
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Oh and sorry for almost killing all of us last night... twice...
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
dude I fucking saw you snort tequila
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
