he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
sticking your hands in the toilet to wash your face is not acceptable. ever. i don't care how drunk you are.
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
I'm at 45 minutes post orgasm, and I still feel my insides spasming. Pretty sure I just fucked Superman.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize