Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
i really wish someone from a royal background would fuck me so i could literally say i was 'royally fucked'.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
We sang "Whole New World" in harmony and he spun me around. You may now barf from the cuteness.
You'd think the neighbors would be used to grown men coming into my house drunk at 230 am.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
she was all excited about us being eskimo sisters and then i was just like "alyssa i've literally been inside of you" and she got even more excited
Randomize
