you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I'm telling people I'm celibate. It sounds cooler when it's by choice.
i just realized i put more money and effort into 420 then i did for christmas
you kept saying 'can i put my penis on the grill?' and it was all i could do to stop you. you're welcome, though
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Somehow I don't think offering me edibles is what dad meant by checking in on me
They're the hard candy kind!
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
