ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
i thought i should point out that whatever else you can say about me, i've still gotten high with a midget.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
He bought segways. We ride them when we get drunk. Last night he ran through the sliding glass door.
I'm missing a sock, a boot, and antlers. We need to get on that.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
This couple is walking their pig around campus
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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