: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
Tell me why I'm at Target and this entire Spanish family is crowding around the condoms questioning which ones they should get
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
Randomize
