Is it wrong to want to cut a hole in the Tigger suit so I can molest you while I wear it?
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
you stuck pieces of bread to your face with peanut butter and asked if it looked like you had a facial yeast infection.
ohhhh that's why they asked me to leave...
i think ive reached a prime reproductive point in my life or somethin- i see gingers and all i want to do is have their babies. like my body knows that i have a to carry on a legacy
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
Just calling to thank you for not dying. I love you.
Randomize
