You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
I have a new fascination with cutting really small segments of hair off peoples heads when they're not looking.
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
mom just told me i had to find a fake by next wednesday.
Listen, it's not like I meant to bust the window out. It just sort of happened. And I'm also sorry for stealing your dads bandanas.
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
You're the common denominator of my blackouts.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
Randomize
