So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
you know something has gone wrong in your life when you've gotten a court order to stay away from ALL mc donalds.
she's my drunk super hero.
Also, did that cop draw hearts on everyone's hands last night?
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
I just pull a splinter from the head of my penis. It was a rough night.
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
He said he was walking down to the White Castle for sliders, still drinking straight from a 750. He came back two hours later pushing a grocery cart that had two puppies in it.
The puppies promptly had the squirts all over the living room, as he had fed them the sliders.
At the bar, some guy bumped into you and you screamed "hey, don't touch what you can't afford sunshine!"
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
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