What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
I thought the fact that I took home a 42 year old with 3 kids would excuse my tardiness this morning because my boss is also 42 and has 3 kids. Boy was I wrong.
it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
She's trying to master eating with her feet. She said it was be she "always has to be prepared."
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
On a lighter note, the guy I gave a lap dance to then fell asleep on his crotch just facebook friend requested me..
All I wanted was a hug. You dirty, dirty whore.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
You put a bag of sliced onions in the microwave then screamed, "voila, onion rings!"
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
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