Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
i just met rob pattinson in italy. he's so stupid, i feel like i would have to say "your penis goes here!"
Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
After your mom took her 12th and fatal tequila shot she proceeded to fall head first into the bonfire... Guess I don't have to fear getting old after all
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
So the old dude that tried to fight me is definitely Katie's dad. And the pot cookie's kicking in. Shit is getting weird.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Would it be creepy if I masturbated with my face in the pillow he slept on last night? Cuz I'm pretty sure that's about to happen
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
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