you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
Do you think I could convince a doctor that my uterus is poisoning me? It wouldn't technically be a lie. It does more harm than good.
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
Don't Richard Nixon her vagina
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
I'm sorry my shit is everywhere... I accidentally got drunk while packing
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize
