epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
At this point i guess a traditional, non-life-threatening pity fuck is too much to ask for
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
You also proposed and then tried to jack me off
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
I just spent 3 hours in the back of an unmarked police cruiser. Best. Date. Ever.
Every guy I've ever fucked is single right now
Pray for me
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
definitely good. no good can come from sex in a very full public venue.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
