Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
I am wearing two different shoes and just swallowed my gum. Wake the fuck up and bang the bartender already.
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
Randomize
