I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I'm more concerned about the fact that I can't feel my gums
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
traded hat for shot of whiskey. lovah yo life. only ADVENTURE NOW. OH GOD IT WENT TO CAPS LOCK
Since the world is still here you can go ahead and disregard those pictures I sent
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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