Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Of course I understand. Thou shalt never turn down a free meal or drink. It's one of the commandments of being a girl.
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
No he reached for my hand at the beach. I pretended to be a seagull.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
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