What's wrong?
Long week. Sore muscles. Bad back. Hangover. Mini-keg. Crazy ex-wife. Unavailable love-interest. Dead celebrity families. Republicans.
Pussy.
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
We may have a problem that even dr. phil cant solve
hey girl hope you're alright, you hit that tree really hard. have a good night.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
He managed to find a wheel chair and a super mario hat, now hes rolling around screaming "real life mario kart!"
Would it be playing god to put spaghetti on my pizza?
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Been smoking since 4. The inevitable finally happened: I bought a cheesecake.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
Randomize
