Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
We are probably going to have to use your boobs as currency to get this done
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
It takes a special kind of man to fart REALLY loudly right before entering a woman and still get some. This has been a state of bootytown address.
My girl came home. i was jacking off on the couch and she just starts telling me about her day, as if im not half naked with my hand on my cock.
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
I dont think you understand. A NOODLE FELL OUT OF MY VAGINA! I DEMAND TO KNOW WHAT YOU DID TO ME LAST NIGHT!
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