I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
So, remember how that one doctor said it was 1 in a million that I'd get pregnant...
Yeeah thank god
Well..welcome to parenting Mr. one in a million.
Do you remember unrolling paper towels as a blanket?
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I just thought about how many drinks I had last night and threw up.
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
