do you know your status is "goal for vegas: hook up with a girl AND a boy"?
and THATS why i'm not adding my mom on facebook
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
I just found out how hard it is to put together a fake Christmas tree with a hangover.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
I'm sorry. I slept with him again. On the plus side he's got better at it!
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize
