Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
I just got a call from the front desk apparently one of my feiends was dropped off by a handicap bus passed out in a wheel chair unlv is goig down
I'm at a restaurant. I am NOT about to discuss my asshole over the phone.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
Randomize
