Whoa Z and x make the same sound
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
i dont care if i have to wear a pillow case, there will be an open bar at my wedding
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
You basically tried to anal probe my passed out friend with a lamp
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
College is the ONLY place where you can pass off morning sickness as being hungover. I'm currently pouring beer in a spray bottle so I can spray it on myself and smell drunk.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
He told you he loved you. Then you wanted to find a chainsaw to cut his dick off.
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
Randomize
