this coming from the guy that still thinks "pulling out" is a good form of birth control? just walk away
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
He just kept petting my ear and informing me that I wasn't one of the guys
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
told our landlord the hole in the wall was from your head during drunk sex..
how did he take it?
not as well as i would have thought
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
I'm really sorry that I blew your friend in your bed, but to be fair he started it.
I woke up wearing my panties and an eyelash, soo I'd say your birthday was a success.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
Stop trying to get me to choose vodka over a nap
Randomize
