HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
Im going home to examine my vagina with a hand mirror. wish me luck.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I found a fried uncrustable on the table from last night.
I'm at a winery and there's a 50 yr old woman sitting at a table alone with a bottle of wine and the only time I've seen her get up is to harass the hot dog guy
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
We found him wrapped up in a giant table umbrella in the bathroom.
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
yknow last night was like... the third night in a row alex woke me up to make sure i wasn't dead and tbh it's sorta sweet.
Randomize
