So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
That adds atleast one bjs worth of awkward sexual tension between us.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
just got in my apt...and theres jungle juice here i left from over a month ago..this could be interesting...or deadly
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
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