Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
It's one of those mornings when I woke up thinking that i really shouldn't have hooked up with my ex boyfriend's girlfriend just to prove a point.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Taking a shit on the side of the road is not how I imagined this morning would start.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I met my future wife last night. She's a bombshell from Delaware, hates Trump, and humiliated two old men in a GOP healthcare debate while simultaneously convincing them to pick up both of our bar tabs.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
