I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I know it's not standard practice to meet the couple you donate to, but i'm curious as to what kind of people saw my picture and said, we want that girl's eggs
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I think I'm making a tradition of going to every funeral with at least one sex-related bruise. I don't know how this happened.
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Have you ever got so drunk that you tasted the future?
She said she was sober from drugs for a week. All I heard was Kenny Loggins singing Danger Zone.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
