After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
raced the clock twice to day to see if i could get off before my computer died and before i left for my noon bar crawl... win, win
lets go back to having secrets in our friendship
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
Kind of like the new iOS 10 because I can send sexts with fireworks or confetti. Really gets the point across
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
Hey do you or anyone you know want to get drunk for free? At 4pm tonight at rctc for field sobriety training for future cops
FUCK ME I smuggled weed onto a plane by accident
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
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