So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
it was a 10 min screaming orgasm. i don't care that you were next door and didn't appreciate all the noise.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Like I could say no to two hot people already naked and fucking. Please. I'm not made of stone.
Twice?!
Also while I’m drunk I saw your penis in like 4th grade when I walked past the boys bathroom
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
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